The Philosophy of Making it Rain and a Baby

 


I have to say, I am old. As a result, I don't cotton to the new brand of "hippity-hop". The last time I bought hip-hop music was in 1907.

It was a song by MC Braggadocious and was made on a wax cylinder. We called them "cylinderies" back then. We would have called them "waxies" but that referred to a buckle which one would use to keep ones knickers attached to ones shoes. It's best not to ask too many questions. Suffice it to say, those were vastly different times.

Anyway, for the longest time, I haven't been able to understand this new incarnation of hippity-hop and all it's hippity-hoppity jargon. That is until the spectacular new phrase "Making it Rain." I have to say I had assumed all current music was far too materialistic. However "Making it Rain" is a philosophy that has changed the tenor of hippity-hop music entirely.

For those who are unfamiliar, Making it Rain is the act of holding a large stack of money in one's palm and then flicking it in the air, giving the effect that it is indeed raining. But not raining droplets of life-giving water, you instead become witness to a downpour of lovely money.

Brilliant!

Watching this on The BET, I was immediately able to ascertain the genesis of this concept which obviously has its roots in Taoist philosophy. You are all no doubt familiar with the Taoist story illustrating the wisdom of a baby over that of an adult. It is said that if a baby is given a $10 bill, he will immediately put it in its mouth and begin chewing it. After realizing the bill has no nutritional value, he will spit it out. However if you give the same $10 to an adult he will grab it and put it in his pocket, baby spit and all, in anticipation of spending it on some ill-gotten gain.

Probably crack.

The question then is who is the wiser, the baby or the adult with a slobber soaked bill in his pocket? Most folks would say obviously the adult is smarter he's got $10 extra in his pocket, for which to purchase $10 worth of delicious crack. But I would point out the question was who is WISER not smarter. And while I'm in a pointing kind of mood, I would further point out that crack probably is not all that delicious. If you're going to succeed at these kinds of tests you really should pay closer attention to the questions.

The Taoist philosopher would assert that the baby is indeed wiser because he has determined that if the bill cannot provide nourishment, it has no actual value. The value of the bill is an illusion based on the fact that we have all agreed it is "valuable." However, if you were stranded on a deserted island, it would become clear very quickly that the baby-spit soaked bill in your pocket would be utterly worthless. Food though, would have the highest value. Which is why the baby in this story is the wise-man. He knows intrinsically what is important.

So when I saw the hippity-hoppers on The BET "Making it Rain", it was clear they too saw the futility of rampant materialism and after realizing its illusory nature simply discarded the money. Their embracing of Taoist philosophy is to be commended and...

...What?...

...What are you talking about?...

...That's not what "Making it Rain" means?...

...In fact it means the exact OPPOSITE?...

...The hippity-hoppers were being ignant...

Again.

Good grief.

I'm going to bed.

Official Use of the N-word

Get him!

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